How to Get Over Your Fear of Being Judged

How you judge yourself is much more important than how others judge you.

I was mired in fear for most of my life, especially the fear of being judged by others. For a long time, I didn’t even realize I had this fear. Once I did, I then realized — I’m going to be judged no matter what. So how about if I get judged for being the actual me, instead of some fake version of me?! If you’re afraid of being judged by others, that can change. I’m living proof!

I was afraid of what others might think of me.

For the first 5+ decades of my life, I was completely blind to much of what I was thinking and doing, as well as what my motives were. Some people call that blindness “denial.” I talk about this type of denial in the last piece I published on Medium so I won’t go into that here. An example of my denial is that I was mired in fear but didn’t know it. The only way I know this now is that the fear is gone and I can tell the difference. I had no idea how fearful I was until I wasn’t anymore.

Most of that fear was about what others might think of me. I was afraid they’d judge me. Being the people-pleasing, codependent addict I was, I couldn’t have that! If you’re anything like I was, here’s how that works.